The Innocence of Youth
by rogueop452
Summary: Exploring relationships.Kyle and Amanda.Others may follow.
1. Chapter 1

_Taking it slow can be difficult when you're in a relationship with the girl of your dreams. Especially when she's all you can think about. But before you focus on the physical side of a relationship it's important to develop the emotional side. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to romance. What works well for one couple may be totally inappropriate for another..._

Amanda tugged on the pillow. "Sit up for a second," she instructed Kyle.

"I'm really sorry Amanda," Kyle said as he leaned forward, allowing Amanda to reposition the pillow behind his back. "I know a bathtub isn't a very comfortable place to be doing this."

"Okay...now scrunch down a little and bring your knees up more."

Kyle did as he was told.

Amanda assessed his positioning briefly before reaching over the side of the tub for another pillow. Placing it next to Kyle she began patting it down in place.

Kyle watched her with light amusement as she struggled to form the pillow to the shape of the tub. "I know you said it was too drafty, but maybe the floor would work better after all," he suggested.

"No," Amanda said with stubborn determination, giving the pillow a few last forceful pats. "This...will work...just...fine." Finally satisfied, Amanda scooted down next to Kyle, carefully adjusting herself into a half spooning position on her side with her back wedged up against the tub and her head propped up with one elbow.

Once she was settled in place, Kyle turned his body a little so that he could put his arm around her. "Are you comfortable now? I can get another pillow..."

"No...I'm okay...," Amanda replied quickly.

"Are you sure?" Kyle asked searching her eyes.

Kyle's genuine concern brought a smile to Amanda's lips. "Well, it's not exactly the easiest place to snuggle," she admitted. "But I don't mind. Besides, it's not like we can do this at my house. My mom would totally flip if she even suspected that we were beyond the holding hands stage. I don't know why she's so worried. She knows I don't believe in sex outside of marriage."

Kyle's brows furrowed. "Sometimes it's not easy for parents to see their children in situations that may end up being hurtful."

Amanda looked thoughtful for a moment. "I suppose that's true," she said. "But if she ever took the time to get to know you, she'd realize that you would never do anything to make me unhappy."

"Then maybe we should get together and talk sometime," Kyle suggested with a hopeful look on his face. "I could ask the Trager's to invite her over for dinner..."

"Um...I'm not quite sure she's ready for that yet," Amanda replied tactfully, not wanting to hurt Kyle's feelings. "She's only just agreed to let us see each other. I don't think we should rush things."

Kyle grinned sheepishly. "You're probably right. Every time she sees me her blood pressure rises twelve points. It would be better for her health if I stayed away from her for now...So I guess we'll just have to settle for my accommodations. Sorry..."

"You don't have to apologize Kyle. At least now that I know your 'secret' I know why you prefer sleeping in a bathtub."

"So you don't think it's...peculiar?"

Amanda hesitated, not sure if she should tell him the truth. "Well maybe a little," she said, deciding it was better to be honest with her feelings. "But don't worry," she added, "everyone has a bit of an inner freak in them."

Kyle frowned. "An inner what?"

"An inner freak...you know," Amanda answered vaguely. She reached over with her right hand and began deftly feeding the buttons on his shirt through the buttonholes.

"No. I don't know," Kyle admitted. "I may have a beyond genius IQ but when it comes to human relationships, I just don't have a clue."

Amanda paused with his shirt half way undone. "That's right. I keep forgetting." She smiled at him adoringly. "You're just so darn cute sometimes Kyle."

The corners of his eyes crinkled in amusement. "So what does it mean?" he asked and then jumped a little when Amanda suddenly slid her ice cold hand inside his shirt. He quickly but gently grasped her hand, lifting it off of his chest. Bringing his other arm back around, he began rubbing her hand briskly between his larger ones.

"Oh...sorry," Amanda said once she realized what he was doing. As he warmed her hand, she tried to think of the best way to answer his question without giving the impression that she was an expert on the subject. "Well..." she began, "your inner freak is kind of like your deep rooted desire that you keep hidden away from the public eye. We all have one in us...Even me," she added shyly.

"You do?" Kyle asked. Remembering a conversation he'd had with Declan earlier his brow knitted with worry. "You're not going to suddenly turn into a succubus and drain all the energy from me are you?" he asked her suspiciously.

Amanda giggled. "No silly."

"Good," Kyle said breathing a sigh of relief. "You had me worried."

Amanda frowned when she suddenly realized that Kyle might not have been joking. "Wait, you didn't seriously think..." Her voice trailed off in disbelief.

Kyle gave her a sheepish look. "Declan told me I should watch out for girls like that."

"And why would Declan be warning you about succubusis or succubisis?" Amanda asked in confusion.

Kyle grinned. "The plural of succubus is succubi."

"Okay...So who would he be...?" She paused. "Oh..." she said knowingly. She met Kyle's eyes.

"Lori...," they both chimed in unison.

Amanda beamed. She loved when they were in sync like that.

Kyle turned her hand over, planting a gentle kiss on her palm before releasing it. She smiled at him. Turning her attention back to his shirt, she finished unbuttoning it and pushed it aside. She studied his firm hairless chest and belly button free six pack with interest. "For someone who was stuck in a test tube for sixteen years, you're really buff Kyle," she said in awe and then wished she could take back her words when she realized how insensitive her comment sounded.

Kyle blushed. He looked down at his chest. "I guess I am."

Amanda smiled at his innocence, glad that he hadn't taken offense. She hesitantly placed her hand on his chest. His skin felt warm. She could feel his heart beating a steady rhythm beneath her palm.

"So," Kyle said, in order to distract himself from the slight arousal he was already beginning to feel from her touch. "What's yours?"

"What's my what?" Amanda asked.

"Your 'deep rooted desire that you keep hidden away'," he quoted.

Suddenly Amanda's hand froze in place. She stared at his chest. "Did you know your left nipple is bigger than your right one?" she asked with a perplexed look on her face.

"Yes, of course," Kyle replied, wondering if she was trying to change the subject. "To be more precise my left nipple is one point four millimeters larger than my right."

"That's just so...weird."

Kyle laughed. "The fact that I don't have a belly button doesn't bother you but you think it's weird that one of my nipples is a little bit larger than the other?"

"One point four millimeters larger," she stated matter of factly, staring at his chest in wonderment.

"Right...You still haven't answered my question."

Amanda raised an eyebrow at him. "You want to know what my hidden desires are?"

He nodded.

Amanda thought for a moment. A mischievous look crossed her face briefly before she turned a serious one in his direction. "If I told you I'd have to kill you."

Kyle blinked, his eyes widening in surprise.

Amanda tried to keep a straight face, but Kyle's expression made her giggle. "Sorry I couldn't resist. It's just a cliché Kyle," she added when she saw his sudden confusion. "I wouldn't really kill you."

"Oh, I get it," he said with a good natured chuckle.

Although Amanda wasn't so sure he did.

His brow furrowed. "I understand if you don't want to tell me Amanda. I shouldn't have pried."

"No, it's not that," she said hesitantly. She blushed. "I know...How about if you tell me yours first?" she said stalling for time.

Kyle grinned. "You already know mine...I like to sleep in a bathtub."

"That one doesn't count. Tell me another one."

Kyle quirked an eyebrow. "Another one? I'm not sure I have another one."

"Sure you do. In fact I bet you have tons of them. All boys your age have certain...fantasies."

"We do?" Kyle stared at her blankly for a few moments. "Oh," he said suddenly. "You mean..._sexual_ fantasies."

"I guess," Amanda replied, immediately feeling a little unsure if she really wanted to know Kyle's sexual desires. "Wait...maybe this isn't such a good idea."

Kyle looked at her distractedly, his thoughts already shifting to the dreams he'd been having of Amanda ever since he'd met her. He mentally shook himself. "What isn't a good idea?"

"You know...discussing your erotic fantasies while we're lying here like this. What if you start to get...?" She let her voice trail off and glanced down towards his groin suggestively.

Kyle grinned. "You mean like what happened at the pool?" he asked, wondering if he should tell her that the same thing happened almost every time they were together.

Amanda nodded.

"Why? Would it make you uncomfortable?" he asked with sudden concern.

Amanda crinkled her nose. "Maybe a little," she admitted.

"Okay. Then let's change the subject. The last thing I want to do is make you feel uncomfortable."

Amanda smiled at him. "You're so sweet Kyle. You're always thinking of my feelings."

"I try," he said modestly.

She gave him a quick peck on the lips. Liking the way that felt she continued. After a couple of minutes, she started to get a crick in her neck. She reluctantly pulled away from him.

Kyle's eyes fluttered open. "Is something the matter?" he asked quickly.

"You're right," she said with a chuckle, "this isn't very comfortable."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I do not own the songs below.

_I've had the time of my life  
No I never felt this way before  
Yes I swear it's the truth  
And I owe it all to you_

_'Cause I've had the time of my life  
And I've searched though every open door  
Till I found the truth  
And I owe it all to you..._

When the ending song for the movie finished playing Kyle reached for the remote on the table next to him with his free hand and turned the DVD player off. He glanced over at Amanda, cuddled up against his left side.

"Isn't 'Dirty Dancing' just the greatest movie ever?" she asked dreamily.

Kyle looked thoughtful for a moment before answering, "I don't really have a lot to compare it to. I haven't had the opportunity to watch that many movies. I guess it was interesting enough."

Briskly removing Kyle's arm from around her shoulders Amanda sat up stiffly on the edge of the couch. "Oh come on Kyle...It's a timeless classic. How could you not have liked it?"

"I didn't say I didn't like it," Kyle said, a little taken aback by her abrupt withdrawal. "I said it was interesting."

"Yes, I know, but saying something is 'interesting' is just a nice way of saying you didn't particularly care for it without coming right out and saying it."

"It is?" Kyle asked in confusion. "Then that's not what I meant."

Amanda's expression softened. "Then what _did_ you mean Kyle?" she asked in a gentler tone.

Kyle was unsure of what to say. He didn't want to lie to Amanda, but he knew if he told her the truth her feelings might be hurt. Remembering a line from the movie Kyle grinned inwardly. This was obviously one of those times when he couldn't win no matter what he did. He decided that honesty would be the best policy. "I would never lie to you Amanda. But I'm wondering if this is one of those occasions when I should. You obviously feel passionate about this movie. Anything negative I have to say about it will only upset you."

"I just want your honest opinion," Amanda assured him. "I won't get upset. I promise."

"Are you sure?" Kyle asked.

She held up three fingers. "Girl scouts honor."

Kyle had no idea what Amanda meant by that remark or why she was holding up her hand like that, but after detecting no sudden increase in her heart rate, he determined that she was telling the truth. "Okay," he began, trying to choose his words wisely this time. "Overall...I liked it. It was entertaining and romantic...and the dancing was great. But there were certain aspects that I thought were a little...unrealistic."

Amanda's eyes widened. "In what way was it unrealistic?"

Kyle frowned. "You said you weren't going to get upset."

"I'm not getting upset," Amanda said stubbornly.

Kyle read her heart rate again and raised an eyebrow at her.

Amanda knew she couldn't argue. "Fine...I'm a little upset," she admitted with a slight pout. She hated when he used his abilities against her like that.

The corners of Kyle's mouth twitched with amusement. "Do you want me to continue?"

"Yes. Please do," Amanda replied contritely, realizing she was acting a little immature and irrational.

"Well, if this was supposed to take place in the 1960's then the music was all wrong. And I don't think teenagers wore their hair like that back then either."

Amanda rolled her eyes. "You're missing the point Kyle..."

"And the ending left too many questions open," Kyle continued.

Amanda paused. "You mean like if they stayed together or not?"

Kyle nodded.

"That's just it Kyle. It wasn't about if Baby and Johnny stayed together or if she went off to college. The story was about first love. That one special moment in time that you'll always remember. Whether they 'lived happily ever after' doesn't matter."

"Oh...," Kyle said. "I get it. It's up to the viewer to decide how they end up."

"Exactly."

"Well then I think they stayed together," Kyle replied matter of factly.

"Even though they were so different?" Amanda asked with a smile.

Kyle returned her smile. "Just because their pasts are dissimilar, doesn't mean they weren't meant for each other."

They held each others gaze for a long moment.

Suddenly for the first time, Amanda became aware of the silence in the Trager household. She glanced around the room. "It looks like the rest of the gang deserted us...I guess they weren't interested in the movie after all."

Kyle's brow furrowed at the slight note of disappointment in Amanda's voice. "Stephen and Nicole had a PTA meeting to attend," he explained, "and Josh decided to head over to Andy's house. The movie wasn't quite what he was expecting. I'm not sure, but I think he was confused by the title." Kyle grinned. "He said he'd rather get stabbed in the eye with a rusty pair of scissors than watch another chick flick. Evidently Andy made him watch 'The Notebook' the other day. He's still recovering."

"And Lori...?" Amanda prompted.

"Lori went to the mall about a half hour before the movie ended. Hillary needed help picking out a necklace for the prom that would go well with a tiara." Kyle affectionately brushed a tendril of blonde hair back from Amanda's cheek. "I guess you were so absorbed in the movie you didn't notice when they left. You didn't even eat any of my Sour Patch Kids. I saved you all the red ones since they're your favorite." He pulled the bag of candy from beside him. A small smile played on his lips as he offered them to her.

Amanda couldn't help but smile at Kyle's almost childish exuberance. She knew he was only trying to make her feel better. But she had a better way and it didn't involve candy. "Well...," Amanda began, her smile widening, "I guess that means we have the whole house to ourselves." She waggled her eyebrows at Kyle suggestively.

"Is there something in your eye?" he asked with sudden concern.

Amanda stared at Kyle in disbelief, hoping beyond hope that he was teasing her. He couldn't possibly be so innocent. When she didn't pick up any signs to the contrary, she shook her head in resignation and reached for the bag of candy.

"So...you chose the theme for prom based on the hit song from the movie?" Kyle asked.

Amanda nodded. "'The Time of Our Lives'...and people are still giving me grief over it. I hope everything turns out okay on prom night. I want it all to be perfect."

Kyle gave her a reassuring smile. "With _you_ being in charge of the prom committee, I'm sure everything will turn out just fine," he replied, making a mental note to do his own video research on the subject of 'prom night' to ensure just that.

"We'll see," Amanda stated noncommittally. She'd had a nagging suspicion all week that things weren't going to go quite as planned. Not wanting to spoil the evening with visions of doom and gloom she put the thought out of her head.

Rising from the couch she walked over to the DVD player. "'Dirty Dancing' is one of my favorite all-time movies ever," she remarked as she pushed the eject button. She carefully removed the disc from the tray, holding it out almost reverently away from her body to keep it from getting scratched. "I never grow tired of it no matter how many times I watch it."

"I could tell you were really enjoying it," Kyle replied. "You were quoting quite a few lines right along with the actors."

Amanda glanced in the direction of the couch and saw two sparkling blue orbs regarding her with amusement. She cringed inwardly. "I know. Sometimes I can't help myself. I've seen it so many times I have all the lines memorized."

Kyle picked up the DVD case from the coffee table and read the date of release on the back. "This Twentieth Anniversary Edition only came out last year. How many times _have_ you seen it Amanda?" he asked curiously.

"Counting today? Thirty four..." Remembering the condescending remarks that admission usually elicited Amanda narrowed her eyes. "...and if you say 'oh you poor thing' I'll...Well I don't know what I'll do, but I promise it won't be nice."

Kyle looked up in surprise. "I would never say that to you," he said while handing her the case.

Amanda heard the sincerity in his words and immediately felt guilty. "Sorry..." she said. "I was just venting." She snapped the disc gently into the case and closed it over. Setting it down on the coffee table she stood in front of Kyle, an apologetic smile curving her lips.

An unexpected feeling of tenderness washing over him, Kyle reached for her hand. He leaned back a little on the couch and patted his lap invitingly.

Pleasantly surprised Amanda tentatively seated herself sideways across Kyle's knees. She felt butterflies forming in her stomach from the anticipation. She'd been looking forward to this moment all evening. A nervous giggle escaped her lips. "I feel like I should tell you what I want for Christmas."

Kyle draped his arm around her waist. He looked a little confused. "Why? It's not even Easter."

Even though Amanda knew Kyle's sense of humor was still in the developmental stage she was never quite sure if he was making a joke. "You're teasing me aren't you?" she asked suspiciously. When Kyle looked at her blankly, she explained. "I was making a reference to mall Santas."

"Let me guess...it was another one of those clichés. Right?"

Amanda saw the twinkle in his eyes and smiled. "Okay...Now I _know_ you're teasing me."

Kyle smiled sheepishly. "Sorry...I couldn't resist. One of Stephen's favorite holiday movies is 'A Christmas Story'." His smile broadened. "I bet he's watched it _way_ more than thirty four times over the years."

"Very funny," Amanda said slapping at Kyle's chest playfully.

Kyle caught her hand. Gently pulling her close, he kissed her tenderly on the lips. When the kiss ended he gave her a lopsided grin. "I couldn't resist that either." Noting what he thought to be a look of uncertainty on Amanda's face Kyle's brow furrowed with worry. "Amanda...If you don't want to..."

"When you leave me, sweet kisses I miss," Amanda said dreamily.

Kyle recognized her words as a line from a song in the movie. "Amanda?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes Kyle...?" she answered sweetly.

Kyle grinned quickly catching on. "How do you call your lover boy..." he asked.

"Come here lover boy..." Amanda answered.

"And if he doesn't answer..." Kyle asked.

Amanda grinned and crooked her finger. "Oh lover boy..."

"And if he still doesn't answer..." Kyle asked.

"I simply say...Oh baby my sweet baby you're the one," she said softly, mesmerized by the intensity of his eyes as they searched hers.

"Oh baby my sweet baby you're the one," Kyle said wrapping his arms around her. He hesitated briefly before finally meeting her lips.

Melting into the warmth of his embrace, Amanda closed her eyes and lost herself in the moment as the world around them drifted into the background...


	3. Chapter 3

A short Jessi/Sarah moment...

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I do not own the song below.

_If I fell in love with you  
would you promise to be true  
And help me understand  
'Cause I've been in love before  
And I've found that love is more  
Than just holding hands_

_If I gave my heart to you  
I must be sure from the very start  
that you would love me more than her_

_If I trust in you, oh please  
don't run and hide,  
if I love you too, oh please  
don't hurt my pride like her_

_'Cause I couldn't stand the pain  
And I would be sad  
If our new love was in vain_

_So I hope you see that I  
would love to love you  
And that she will cry  
when she learns we are two_

_'Cause I couldn't stand the pain  
And I would be sad  
If our new love was in vain_

_So I hope you see that I  
would love to love you  
And that she will cry  
when she learns we are two  
If I fell in love with you..._

As I sit in the front passenger seat of my mother's car staring down the road ahead with unfocused eyes I find myself having to swallow back the tears. I know I'm being silly. It's ridiculous really. But for whatever reason, the song I just heard on the radio struck a chord with me and has left me feeling both pensive and hopeful at the same time. I have given my love not once but twice in my short span of consciousness and each time it _was _in vain.

Looking back at my actions, I see how utterly naive I was, and not only in the romance department. I blindly put my trust in two potentially dangerous individuals who used their position as my guardian for their own personal gain. And ironically here I am again entrusting my fragile battered heart to a virtual stranger.

I know that Sarah would never hurt me, and that unlike Emily and Brian she _has_ no hidden agenda. I have always yearned to be part of a family and now that I've found my mother, I finally feel as if I belong. And yet, I can't shake the feeling of uncertainty...

"Is everything okay Jessi?"

My mother's voice jars me back into reality. "Yes...everything is fine...," I answer quickly albeit a little guiltily. Lies don't seem to roll as easily off my tongue lately. Catching her furtive glance in my direction out of the corner of my eye, I casually bring up my hand to wipe away any tell tale signs of my unexpected melancholy.

"You've been awfully quiet...Is there something on your mind..." she asks.

I can hear the concern in her voice, and remembering my newfound resolve to put other people's happiness first, I refrain from burdening her with my troubled thoughts. "I'm just a little tired. That's all," I answer vaguely, hoping she won't pursue her line of inquiry but nevertheless mentally bracing myself for a probing line of questioning just in case.

"Well why don't you take a nap then Sweetie," Sarah suggests after a long pause. "I'll wake you up when we get to the hotel."

"Okay...maybe I will," I reply, feeling grateful for the reprieve. I slump down a little in my seat.

"I'm really looking forward to our future together," she adds.

The fact that her heartbeat doesn't rise comforts me. "Me too," I reply. We share a smile. I lean my head against the window, letting the coolness of the glass calm my conflicting emotions.

Have I made the right decision this time? The question seems to constantly be in my thoughts. How can I be sure? I suppose only time will tell. But just like in the song...I have put my trust in Sarah. And if I'm proven wrong? I couldn't stand the pain.

Despite my insecurities I know my mother cares for me, but if it suddenly ends up going terribly wrong, I know of at least one person that will be there by my side to help me pick up the pieces. Just like I would do for him. Nothing can break the bond Kyle and I share with each other. It will never be a romantic relationship but I've realized lately that I actually prefer it that way. And as for any future potential relationships...well as the saying goes, 'The third time is the charm'. I can only hope that someday that will ring true for me. Perhaps it already has...

With each mile that separates me from my past I can feel the anticipation building. The memories that I can call my own are both bitter and sweet, and I am more than eager to start new ones with my mother. I have no idea what the future might bring...but then, what normal sixteen year old girl does?


	4. Chapter 4

While keeping Amanda company in the school locker room as she readies herself for prom I suddenly sense Kyle's presence nearby. I close my eyes and concentrate, quickly picking up the familiar steady beat of his heart. I know Kyle would hear my heartbeat as well if he wasn't otherwise preoccupied with the perfect prom equation. But even if he _was_ listening at the moment, I also know it wouldn't be_ my _heartbeat that he'd be listening for.

When I feel what I have determined over time to be deeply imbedded memories from one of Madacorp's reprogramming sessions to turn my affections towards Kyle resurfacing, I find myself fighting back the powerful urge to let jealousy rear its ugly head. Even though Amanda hasn't made any effort to hide her _own_ feelings of _genuine_ jealousy towards me, I don't want to spoil her evening. I know her happiness is important to Kyle. Besides, after her failure with the prom decorations, she seems to be on the verge of an emotional melt down. I don't want to be the proverbial straw that breaks the camels back.

I let a slow smile form on my lips as the image of that analogy suddenly flashes in my head. My smile deepens when I picture Amanda in her silver prom dress and pointy high heeled shoes kicking and screaming in fear as she rides that same camel across the dance floor and out the door. So much for fighting back urges.

Swept away with the anticipation of 'the time of her life' while frantically trying to make herself presentable after a rather hectic day spent battling balloons and streamers, Amanda doesn't notice my departure as I silently slip away.

After I step through the doorway and enter the gym I look across the room...and stand perfectly still, momentarily transfixed by the site of Kyle dressed smartly in his tuxedo and polished black shoes. He sets the box he's carrying onto the table next to him and motions for me to come over. As I make my way over to him, I see Josh, Andy and Hillary coming in through a side entrance.

Josh and Andy are each carrying a box of their own. They set them down on the edge of the dance floor and playfully kick blue and white balloons at each other.

"I'm going to the prop room in search of a tiara in case I need a backup date for tonight," Hillary calls out to anyone within earshot as her heels click a determined beat across the gym floor. She waggles her fingers in my direction before quickly disappearing behind the stage curtains.

Kyle greets me warmly, obviously not finding her statement peculiar in the least. "Hey Jessi."

"Hey," I reply. I glance over at Andy and Josh, but quickly look away when I notice them locked in an intimate embrace. "I see the reinforcements have arrived. I thought everyone was going to the dinner first."

"They volunteered to help out instead," Kyle explains. "Well actually Lori pretty much forced them. She's coming in a few minutes. Declan insisted they take the limo since it was already paid for."

"Oh..." I reply casually. "That was nice of them." I shift my attention to our joint project from earlier in the day, giving it a brief inspection. "The vest came out perfect." I hesitantly reach out to brush a few small specks of white paper off of the silver material. "It's a good thing I came to your rescue when I did," I add, unable to resist. "Otherwise it would have been a disaster."

As I suspect, he takes my slight dig in his usual calm manner. "It seems that everyone is coming to my rescue today," he replies almost guiltily. His expression suddenly becomes serious, but he softens it with a smile. "I couldn't have done it without your help. I really appreciate it Jessi."

His words please me, though I try to hide the fact. It's strange how I feel the need for his approval lately. Although I believe my relationship with Kyle has developed into more of a strong friendship on its own, it makes me wonder if Madacorp has reprogrammed my romantic feelings for him with sisterly ones. The thought troubles me and I immediately put it out of my head. I don't want to ruin my last night in Seattle with creepy visions of Ballantine.

I watch as Kyle takes a quick survey of the room. "You were right. The decorations _do_ need a little...something."

Recalling Amanda's confusing statement earlier concerning her own assessment of the situation I decide to share it with Kyle. "It's like Charlie Browns Christmas tree."

"Who's Charlie Brown?" he asks with an amused grin as if anticipating a punch line.

"I'm not sure," I reply. "But evidently his tree is _really_ ugly."

"Oh," he says after a brief pause, but I can tell from the slight furrowing of his brow that he doesn't get it any more than I did earlier.

"So...what did you come up with?" I ask him looking curiously at the box on the table.

"Well...to start with," he begins eagerly, "I remembered Amanda mentioning that her sunset backdrop for the stage was a no show. And that it was vital for her ocean paradise theme. So I created one." He turns his attention to the box, but before he has a chance to open it he's interrupted by Josh and Andy's presence as they stroll over to us holding hands. The two of them seem inseparable lately. I even overheard Hillary jokingly refer to them as 'Jandy' once. It made me wonder if she also had a nickname for Kyle and Amanda or Declan and Lori...The possibilities amused me.

"Where's Amanda?" Josh asks Kyle. Never very good at hiding his emotions, he aims a suspicious look in my direction.

"Don't worry," I tell him with a straight face. "I didn't tie her up and stuff her in a broom closet." I quirk an eyebrow for his benefit. "At least not yet."

Andy laughs good naturedly, quickly picking up on my attempt at teasing. "Good one."

"No...Really...where is she?" Josh persists.

After a few long moments of uncomfortable silence as I watch Josh's suspicion increase and Andy's doubt begin to set in, I relent and crack a smile. "Girls locker room. She's still getting ready." I can see the relief wash over them. My smile widens into a grin. Sometimes it's too easy.

Kyle clears his throat. He shoots me a stern look before continuing with his explanation while attempting to open the box in front of him. "I was just telling Jessi what I did for Amanda earlier to put some of the magic back in prom for her...hopefully all of my work will help alleviate some of her stress." Suddenly he grins sheepishly and shakes out his hand. "My fingers are still worn out from all of the repetitive motion."

"Way to go Kyle my man," Josh says approvingly as he reaches over and pats Kyle on the back. "I'm not even sure what base that is, but you are definitely on your way to the ultimate prom night goal of an inside the park homer. Which is no small feat considering that you and Amanda were voted the last couple to even get past first base before graduation."

I watch in confusion as Andy slaps Josh's arm in annoyance. "Get your mind out of the gutter pervo. He's talking about the decorations."

"I knew that," Josh says while rubbing the sting out of his arm. "I was just adding a little light humor." He turns to Andy with a slight pout. "No need to get hostile."

Andy smiles at him indulgently before leaning in and giving him a quick peck on the lips.

"Mmm...strawberry," Josh says with a grin, and then immediately tries to go in for seconds. But Andy giggles and pushes him away.

Sometimes I think they live in their own private world. I look to Kyle for assistance. "What was Josh talking about?" I mutter.

"I don't know..." Kyle replies with a perplexed look on his face.

"Trust me..." Andy says overhearing our exchange. "You don't want to know." With an obvious attempt to change the subject, she glances at the clock on the wall. "Come on people. We have exactly one hour before the prom begins. Which means...if we have any plans to whip this gym into shape before Cinderella makes her appearance we better get the show on the road."

"Right," Kyle says, quickly opening the box, which from what I can see is filled with his artwork. "I could really use some help putting this backdrop up. I've numbered each sheet sequentially, so it shouldn't be a problem." He glances at Josh with a hopeful look on his face.

Andy nudges Josh when he doesn't immediately respond.

"What?" he asks innocently after noting her expectant look.

Andy rolls her eyes. "That was your cue Babe." She gives Kyle and me an apologetic smile. "You'll have to excuse him. Sometimes his slacker instincts make a rebound."

"Hey!" Josh protests. "I thought I was supposed to save my energy for later tonight. Didn't you say you had big plans for me?"

Andy quirks an eyebrow at him. "And if you want those plans to include _these_..." she motions to her breasts, "you'll lend me a hand with _this_." She grabs the box off of the table and heads for the stage.

Kyle and I exchange amused glances.

Josh shakes his head in despair. "She's got me by the..."

"Thanks," Kyle cuts in.

"No problemo," Josh replies absently before traipsing after Andy. "As long as it doesn't ruin the tux...I'm all for lending a hand to a damsel in distress." He wiggles his eyebrows at Andy suggestively as he joins her on the stage. "And I've been told that these hands can work magic."

Setting the box down gently, Andy rolls her eyes again and grins. "Just get the tape and help me start taping up Kyle's backdrop. And while you're at it tape your mouth shut too."

"Wouldn't that be cutting off your nose to spite your face?" Josh asks with a grin of his own. "Or more accurately, cutting off these talented lips to spite your luscious ones. Or something like that. Either way...you'll be missing out big time."

"I'm sure I'll survive," Andy replies. "Now get taping Romeo. We don't have all night."

"I better go check on Amanda," I volunteer once the show is over. "I hate to say it, but when I left her, she was still looking a little pathetic."

Kyle's brow furrows with concern.

"Don't worry," I assure him. "I'll make sure she's ready in time." I turn to leave, but Kyle stops me with a light hand on my arm.

"Jessi...thanks again. You really _are_ a true friend."

The sincerity of his statement is evident in his voice. Perhaps my relationship with Kyle _has_ developed into more of a strong friendship on its own. This time I let my pleasure at his approving words shine through, visions of Ballantine rubbing his hands together gleefully and shaking his head in approval be damned. "No problemo," I reply.


	5. Chapter 5

"Jessi...we need to talk."

Kyle takes my hand in his and pulls me gently along with him. We walk silently hand in hand, absently kicking at the blue and white balloons along the way. Finally he stops and turns to face me. As I gaze dreamily into his piercing azure eyes, I barely notice that we haven't really moved at all and are still standing in the middle of a baseball field, surrounded by blue and white balloons.

"I've missed you Jessi. You're so beautiful. How could I not have seen that before?"

I hear his words, but they mean nothing to me. I let my eyes wander down to his soft perfect lips. Lips that were once meant for mine. Not so long ago my heart ached for him. And now? I wasn't quite sure what I was feeling. Maybe it was time to find out. I lean into him and press my lips to his. Kissing is new to me, but somehow I just seem to instinctively know what to do. I kiss him softly almost tentatively at first.

Kyle moans with pleasure. His hands trembling with desire, he pulls me in closer. Our bodies meld together, like acrobats in a circus. His lips are firm under mine, almost demanding. I can hear our two hearts beating as one...

Finally, we pull away and smile shyly at each other. With our faces hovering only inches apart, he gazes into my eyes expectantly, as if waiting for me to speak.

I take a breath. Suddenly I hear music playing softly through the speakers in the stadium, signaling that our time together is running out. "I have to go back Kyle. Sarah's waiting for me."

Kyle's smile quickly vanishes. His eyes fill with great sorrow. When he speaks again, his words are heavy with self loathing. "I never should have let you go."

I offer him a gentle smile as I begin to back away. "We'll always have our dreams."

He grasps my hand tighter and searches my face frantically. "What if I come with you? We could start a new life together."

His desperation moves me. I ignore the haunting almost beckoning music. Perhaps there is still some time. Since we are already on the baseball field, we could at least score an inside the park homer together. I reach out for his hand. The Christmas tree tattoo on the inside of his wrist draws my attention. My heart skips a beat, and I begin to hear two hearts instead of one. "What about Amanda? And your family?"

He visibly flinches at her name, but continues on as if he hasn't heard me. "We could leave tonight..."

I shake my head and take another step back, but Kyle won't let go of my hand.

A single tear rolls down his cheek. "I'd leave it all behind just for you Jessi. A picture doesn't lie. We were meant to be together."

"I have to go now Kyle." I pull my hand out of his grasp and turn to leave. As I walk away towards the ocean I hear his voice calling out behind me.

"No! Don't leave me! Jessi come back!"

"It's late!" Sarah says as she breezes into my bedroom.

On the verge of awakening, I hear Sarah's voice and incorporate it into my dream. I turn around. "Wait Kyle...maybe it's not too late!" I shout as the waves lap around my ankles. But my words are lost in the breeze. Kyle's image becomes smaller, until there is nothing left but sand and one lone camel running away wildly in the distance. The music stops.

Sarah turns off my radio alarm clock. "Rise and shine sleepyhead."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

**A.N.** A short daddy/daughter moment between Amanda and her father…Hope you like it.

As I stand at the foot of her bed watching my little one say her nightly prayers a smile comes to my lips. I close my eyes and say a prayer of my own, thanking God for all the wonderful things in my life. I feel so blessed. Blessed to have found such an amazing woman like Carolyn; a devoted wife and loving mother to our precious daughter Amanda. Her passion and love for her family, friends and church has been such an inspiration to me…

"Daddy, are you praying too?" Amanda asks me as she kneels by the side of her bed, the light from her bedside lamp highlighting her golden hair.

My smile widens as I study her inquisitive expression. "Yes…Yes I am Amanda."

She matches my smile with one of her own, sans the missing front teeth. "Good. I like when we pray together. Father Mathewth theth praying together ith an ethenthal element of a Chrithtian family, and that parenth need to take the inithative and thet time athide for it."

I raise an eyebrow. That was quite a mouthful for a five year old…even without the missing front teeth. "Father Mathews is a smart man."

"Thath what Mommy theth too. Thee theth that Father Mathewth and you are two of the motht intelligent men thee knowth."

"Well I can't argue there," I reply with a chuckle.

"Thee altho theth that when I grow up and get married thee hopth that my huthband ith ath thmart and thweet ath you are Daddy."

I know it's selfish but I find myself hoping that day doesn't come for a long long time. "It's getting late," I say with a gentle smile. "Why don't you finish up your prayers and hop in bed."

"Okay...Do you want me to thay the retht of my prayerth out loud?" she asks with a hopeful look in her eyes.

"Sure Sweety...Whatever you want." The words flow off my tongue...as familiar as a stroke of a paintbrush to a canvas.

She closes her eyes tightly shut. Her expression becomes serious once again. "Thank you God for another nithe day. Take care of my Mommy, my Daddy and Gramma and Grampa and everybody elthe in the whole wide world…ethept for Joth Trager…"

"Amanda…"

"Okay, you can take care of him too, even though he makth fun of the way I talk and runth around the yard naked pretending to be Tarthan all the time. Amen."

She quickly scampers under her covers. I smile knowingly as I come around to the side of her bed. So much energy still abounding within her, yet I know she'll be fast asleep within moments after she closes her eyes. Feeling a chill in the air, I pull up her My Little Pony comforter, waiting patiently while she reaches for her stuffed unicorn and places it gently next to her. I tuck the covers under her chin, but pause when she makes a clicking noise with her tongue.

"Daddy," she admonishes me, "You're gonna thmuther Uki…" She pulls her unicorn up higher onto her pillow and adjusts the comforter a few times until she's satisfied that Uki won't suffocate. "There…" She grins and turns her expectant gaze on me.

I plant a kiss on her forehead. "Good night Amanda…Sweet dreams."

"Aren't you forgetting thomthing?" she asks with a slight frown.

"Mommy will be in shortly…"

"Okay, but I wath talking about Uki. You need to kith him too. Otherwithe he'll feel left out."

"Right…we can't have that." I lean over and kiss Uki's horn on his forehead. "Goodnight Uki…Sweet dreams." I give an extra kiss to Amanda. "Night Sweety." When I pull away and see the beginnings of another frown forming on her face, I roll my eyes, but nevertheless lean over once again and plant another kiss on Uki's horn.

"Good night Amanda," I say more forcefully with a light tap to her nose.

She beams up at me. "Mommy ith right. You _are_ thmart Daddy. You can even read my mind. When I grow up and get married, I hope my huthband can read my mind too, jutht like you."

I chuckle lightly. "If that's what you really want, then I hope so too Amanda," I tell her.

"Thath what I really want," she says, her wide blue eyes fixed upon mine. "Night Daddy," she says suddenly, before turning on her side and wrapping the covers around herself more snugly. I cringe inwardly when Uki slips off of her pillow and gets buried under the comforter, but she doesn't notice.

I walk to the doorway and reach for the light switch. Turning around one last time to gaze upon Amanda's sweet innocent face, I continue to count my blessings. I am grateful, not only that God has blessed me with a warm and loving wife and a wonderful marriage and career, but also because He chose to bestow the gift of fatherhood on me. I truly believe that Amanda was sent to me by God and through His divine guidance, she has helped me to redirect my own path towards enlightenment.

I smile across the room at her. Her eyes are already closed and her breathing is steady and slow. I find myself wondering what dreams will fill her head tonight. Knowing Amanda they'll be woven around enchanted unicorns and magical beings. I hope it's a while before they also include damsels in distress and a handsome prince. I say a silent prayer, not only that she experiences a happy loving relationship with the boy of her dreams someday, but that _all_ her hopes and desires in life will be fulfilled.

I gently flick the switch off. The light streaming in from the hallway illuminates her face. I close the door over to block the light out, making sure to leave it open just the amount that she prefers. "Goodnight my little Angel," I say softly into the darkness. _You're Daddy's little girl. I will cherish you forever…_


	7. Chapter 7

**A.N.** A very short Amanda moment.

Chapter 7

All of the Tragers were at some kind of hover board competition with Kyle. Amanda had seen them all excitedly pile into the car earlier. Everyone except for Jessi that is. It was perfect timing. Jessi was home alone. Now was her chance…

Amanda stood on the Trager's doorstep, her hand paused mere inches away from the doorbell. She chewed her bottom lip, mentally debating whether she really wanted to do this. Immediately her mind was flooded with a montage of memories…

Jessi gazing longingly at Kyle from across the school cafeteria. Jessi at her locker in between classes, her eyes following his every move. Jessi showing up unexpectedly at the Rack when he was visiting her at work. Jessi standing next to Kyle at her piano recital…touching his hand…whispering in his ear.

Jessi always finding some excuse to gain Kyle's attention. She was so needy all the time. And Kyle was…Well Kyle was just Kyle…The kindest boy she'd ever known. So giving. So caring. He would never refuse someone in need. Jessi had taken full advantage of that fact, over time, ingratiating herself into every aspect of his life. And now they were even under the same roof. How could she compete with something like that? Especially after…

Amanda clenched her teeth together as that one memory that would forever be etched upon her soul flashed into her mind's eye.

The kiss.

Once again she asked herself. Did she really want to do this? Amanda smiled…The answer coming to her in a heartbeat. A resounding YES! Of course she did!

Amanda rang the doorbell. Quickly bending over, she used the lighter and lit the brown paper bag on fire.

And then she ran like the wind.


End file.
